More ways to beat the scorching heat than sweating at the beach
The temperatures have finally risen, and it looks like what passes for winter in Southeast Texas is over. So put your hoodies and your light sweaters away and show off as much skin as you can on your way to the local cinema or record shop (those still exist, right?) and settle in for a look at what the hottest season has to offer in the way of entertainment.
The Incredibles 2 — Here it is at last, the only Pixar sequel I’ve ever wanted despite how much they keep trying to shove the “Cars” franchise in my face. The original “Incredibles” is my all-time favorite Pixar film, and I could not be more pleased that we’ll soon be going on another adventure with these amazing characters. Plus, how often do you get to see a blockbuster family film starring famed and adorable historian Sarah Vowell as a telekineticly powered teenager? The answer is “not often enough.”
Won’t You Be My Neighbor — I grew up on “Mister Rogers Neighborhood.” It was a daily event in my house to sit in front of the television with a bowl of cereal and a glass of apple juice and find out what Fred Rogers had been up to since we last saw each other the previous morning. I grew up in the ’80s, and by the time I was 6, Fred Rogers was as much a part of my life as my family and the people in my real neighborhood. This documentary offers a look at the life of Rogers and how he turned a fairly simple idea for a show geared toward children into one of the most beautiful and inspiring television programs the world has ever seen.
Ocean’s 8 — “You could never put together a heist of women. Like ‘Ocean’s 11’ with women wouldn’t work, because two would keep breaking off to talk shit about the other nine. Or not even talk shit, just say weird passive aggressive things while they break into the casino. Just be like ‘Aww, I love how you just wear anything.’” — John Mulaney, New in Town, 2012.
Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom — I’ll be the first to admit, “Jurassic World” was just OK. It didn’t go anywhere that the previous films hadn’t, but it did a yeoman’s job of hiking that same trail in a bigger stride. The newest entry promises to go somewhere that Crichton himself had always alluded to in the books, weaponizing dinosaurs. When the former theme park is in danger from an active volcano, a rescue op turns into an auction, selling the animals to the highest bidder as weapons of war. And there’s only one man who can stop it. Chris Pratt is Owen Grady, dinosaur trainer. That all sounded so much better until I got the end. Apologies. Apologies all around.
The Meg — Even though I have severe thalassophobia (a fear of the deep ocean and sea travel), I’m a sucker for a good shark movie. Hell I’m a sucker for a bad shark movie. “The Meg” tells the story of Jason Statham who is trapped in a deep sea research facility that has just uncovered a long thought extinct megalodon. That’s a giant shark for those of you who haven’t been to the natural history museum in a while. I know it probably won’t happen, but I can’t be the only one who is hoping that Statham solves this whole problem with a few well placed kicks to the face.
The First Purge — “The Purge” franchise might be on its last legs after the disappointing sequel “Election Year.” With the fourth entry being a prequel, fans of the series will finally get the answer to the question we’ve asked since the beginning, “How did this happen?” On paper it sounds like a great concept for a horror film, but the night of freedom and insanity has layers and layers of plot holes the more sequels you churn out. Going back to the first purge will either give the creators a chance to iron some of those out or maybe even create more. I hope it’s the former.
Ant-Man and The Wasp — After the collective gut punch that was “Avengers: Infinity War,” this is the palate cleanser everyone needs. We still don’t know exactly where in the timeline of the Marvel Cinematic Universe this story will take place but it seems a good bet that the end will line up with the end of the latest Avengers and segue nicely into “Captain Marvel.” The big news for this entry is the addition of Michelle Pfeiffer as Janet Van Dyne, a founding member of the Avengers in the comics and the original Wasp.
BlacKkKlansman — Spike Lee directing one of my all time favorite true crime stories? Sign me up! Based on the true story of Colorado Springs officer Ron Stallworth, “BlacKkKlansman” chronicles Stallworth’s undercover sting operation of the Klu Klux Klan. During his first year as detective, Stallworth responded to an ad that the Klan published in a local paper looking for new members. Posing as a white man over the phone Stallworth arranged a meeting and convinced a Jewish officer to pose as him for all the in-person interactions. Together they took down one of the most active branches of the Klan in modern history.
Kin — This is honestly probably not going to be a blockbuster, but I hope it finds its audience because the trailer and cast are incredible. Kin tells the story of a young boy and his older brother as they go on the run from government agents and gang members after stumbling across an alien weapon. It feels very much in the vein of “Flight of the Navigator,” which is one of my all-time favorite films from my childhood, so I’m hoping it invokes that same sense of wonder and imagination for a new generation.
Liberation by Christina Aguilera — I have not been this excited for a pop album in years. Christina Aguilera is without a doubt my all-time favorite pop star. After the disappointing sales of her last album “Lotus,” I wasn’t sure we’d ever get another album. But a few weeks ago she started dropping hints on Twitter that she was working on new material, and since then she’s released two new singles, the album track list and a slew of tour dates. The queen is back.
Untitled New Album by Childish Gambino — Now this is an unusual entry for the Guide because we don’t have a title or release date yet. But to be fair we had no idea Gambino was even working on new material until he performed two new tracks on “Saturday Night Live” a couple of weeks ago and followed those performances up with the most talked about music video of the year. If I were a betting man, I would put serious money on a new album taking us by surprise before the first of August. Donald Glover is the artist to watch this year, take notice.
Well that’s all for me folks. If you need me, I’ll be spending the summer with the most adorable little boy in the world and making sure he’s exposed to as much hip hop and folk music as he can handle.
Mahalo!
Commentary by Jeff Dixon who is aware that this is America, and you won’t catch him slipping up.